Blue Mango News Finally Launches
Updated: Feb 20, 2020
Gloucester, Ontario - After years of debating the importance of reporting about people who don’t exist and facts that have nothing to do with reality, we almost considered going along with mainstream News… then, we exploded in laughter!
In a world where the truth is no longer acceptable, we decided to throw in some alternative facts of our own (which are defined as “non-truths good enough for the masses”) and the result is quite exciting.
It turns out that reading Blue Mango News is good for the brain and for the soul. It elevates the mind and soothes the body. In short, BMN lifts you up!
In the future, studies will demonstrate how beneficial reading BMN already is for everyone.
For instance, unlike alcohol, BMN can be consumed without any risk of liver damage.
All the News items published by BMN are smokeless, caffeine and nicotine free.
Our writers don’t use trans fats, artificial sweeteners, artificial colours, or preservatives in their stories.
We also make sure no animal is hurt while we write any News item, whether it’s about the animal itself or something totally unrelated.
Blue Mango News is not a drug, but if you or someone you know laughs for more than four hours after reading BMN, we recommend seeing a health care professional.
We also want to warn you that if you see an actual blue mango in real life, you shouldn’t eat it.
The blue colour may come from the fact that the fruit is way past its due date or that it’s been immersed in a blue liquid which can only be chemical and strong.
Don’t try under any circumstance. Seriously!